As much as I love science, and I’d much rather see billions spent on a collider than war, I gotta admit this is funny as hell.
“Ok, but what does this collider do, that the one you have in the garage won’t do ?”
Mrs Cern.
We have a perfectly good collider at home.
Should have had. That was sad when we gave that up in favor of military spending
However, it also wouldn’t have been as big
I think it was more due to the ISS, Reagan only wanted one international science project
Meanwhile, Star Wars.
Our collider is now two baseball pitchers aimed at each other.
As a former Texan, yes that’s a city name. And you’ll probably pronounce it correctly.
Wax-a-hatch-y?
I feel like this should be required watching for anyone who wants to better understand colliders and the politics around them. BobbyBroccoli made this series on the development of some of them.
I don’t want to learn science from someone named BobbyBroccoli.
Bold claim from a monkey puppet, jk. I’ve watched his channel it’s really good. I found the videos on the collider to be really interesting.
Bold claim from a monkey puppet
Bill Nye is literally just called the science guy and we got invaluable information from him.
How convenient; you won’t be learning science! You’ll be learning history!
You just know the letters of the FCC originally stood for Fucking Collosal Collider.
And from there, we’re one step closer to BFG
No, it was the Large Hardon Collider, and this is the Fat Cock Collider.
What would happen if we put a small collider inside of a bigger collider and spun it around while it spun around?
“Yo dawg, I heard you like colliders, so we built a collider into your collider so it can collide while it collides…”
The way it’s typed out makes it sound like a Vince Russo quote lol
What if they added smaller loops along the main loop, like a roller coaster with loopdy-loops? 🤔
There will be.
Colliders work best at specific speeds, like gears on a car. The big collider is fed by a smaller one. That one is likely fed by an even smaller one. Eventually, you get small enough that a simple linear accelerator can get the gas up to speed.
Oh, and likely a scientist/engineer grinning manically as they “push the trigger” on the largest rail gun in existence.
You find a whee! little boson.
Ahh yes, the infamous Dadjoke particle
Now that you’ve said this I want to know if other shapes without corners are possible
But also why do they need a bigger collider
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Gotta do it before trisolarians come for us.
Shit Sabine Hossenfelder would say. (She funny tho…)
She also did an interview with a holocaust denier so…
Oh ew, really? I’m not overly surprised to be honest, her video on trans people was awful.
Absolutely horrendous. I stopped watching her after that. I don’t care if it was good intentioned or not, she obviously should have expanded her understanding of the topic before presenting herself as an expert on it, and that makes me wonder how many other topics she covers in this way.
I didn’t see that one on her view of trans people, but her recent one on nuclear power was nearly biased and selective enough to be called “disinformation”.
That means you missed her video on how capitalism is good actually. It’s about as horrid as you’d expect.
Is she the reincarnation of Ayn Rand?
Not that bad. She’s still dapable of logical conclusions. Just ignorant, really…
I’d rather have a 100km particle collider than an aircraft carrier.
What if we build it on a 100km aircraft carrier? Think of the possibilities! heh
What if we put an aircraft carrier into a particular accelerator and spin it up to the speed of light?
The sailors would probably get dizzy.
We can only get to 99.999998% or so (I might be off by a decimal) so I think it would just result in light bruising (though probably at the atomic level which tends to sting a bit more).
Always a relevant Onion
This world in arms is not spending money alone. It is spending the sweat of its labourers, the genius of its scientists, the hopes of its children. The cost of one modern heavy bomber is this: a modern brick school in more than 30 cities. It is two electric power plants, each serving a town of 60,000 population. It is two fine, fully equipped hospitals. It is some fifty miles of concrete pavement. We pay for a single fighter plane with a half million bushels of wheat. We pay for a single destroyer with new homes that could have housed more than 8,000 people.
-Dwight D. Eisenhower
In a ideal word, sure, I’d too. But we live among fucking beasts.
Yeah, if history has taught as nothing else, it’s that the guy with the biggest stick usually wins. There are many criticisms of the U.S. military, but no one could accuse it of being weak. That kind of deterrence is invaluable.
we almost built a really fucking big collider in the US somewhere in the middle of fuck off land texas.
It died.
Yep, that was when the US jumped the shark. It was the exact moment, Oct 20, 1993, we went “fuck science, we’re only doing short term profits now.”
for context 22 billion is a few billions less than what elon musk overpaid for twitter. i don’t think a bigger collider will do anything but I’d like for humanity to have this rather than whatever the fuck the rich are doing now.
22 billion is half of what Elon paid for Twitter. He paid 44 billion.
So this seems like a pretty good bargain for unlocking the secrets of the universe.
if i remember correctly twitter was evaluated as 20 billion before musk bought it, so he overpaid by 24 billion dollars which is a couple billion dollars more than the price tag quoted here.
To be fair I think he only paid $14 billion. The rest came from other investors like Saudia Arabia
Yeah… And at least this will generate jobs… And not reduce them like it did on Xitter.
Cern has produced quite some interesting systems for software and data management. I am sure the added value of the work is beyond just understanding particles.
I’m waiting on the equatorial supercollider myself. 40,075km let’s go!
Too small, we need to go bigger.
Ringworld collider, you say?
This is starting to turn into some Full Metal Alchemist shit. If you know, you know.
Is not only about physics research. The complexity of those projects fund hundreds of sectors and push forward new technologies who will have many commercial use.
…Also they’ve confirmed the existence of this little thing called Higgs Boson which field define pretty much reality, soo… not exactly wasted time.
Hopefully they can finally manufacture black holes. Because that would be totally safe for everyone 😉.
There are plenty of natural particles colliders, such as black holes or very dense stars, that are way more powerful than our engineered particle colliders, which (observationally) don’t create black holes around them
They posit that yes, black holes could be formed, but they’re so small they evaporate pretty much instantly. They don’t have the mass to survive.
Awesome. And with reality defined my daily existance and cost of living is. … Exactly the same and killing me. 🙃
