Figure out how to make sexual intercourse or masturbation physically pleasurable. Most people seem to get it naturally, but I can’t crack the code.
Swim
Fold long sleeve buttoned shirts
Snap my fingers. That or whistle.
Pic of fingers please
What are you working with?
lol
That took me longer then it should have to get that joke
That’s a joke ? Seems to me they wanted to see if said fingers were appropriately formed for the study & practice of snapping
Don’t you all count your knuckles for that?
Not me but my partner is 36 yrs old and can’t swim.
I think it depends a lot on where and when you grew up. Afaik in China it’s very much uncommon to be able to swim.
Once I saved a chinese guy from drowning, he was struggling to get back up on his pedalo, where his umbrella-carrying lady was watching us struggle in the river, him frantically gripping the side of the boat like a frog, me with my foot on his ass, pushing him with all my might. They were both obviously embarrassed, neither realizing the dude was 1mn away from exhaustion
I figure, if I hadn’t done that, maybe the situation in Taiwan would be different
Calculate a fucking tip
Alternatively, pressing 0 can be quite easy.
I can calculate 0% of anything in my head quite quickly. Try me.
For a bill of 15.73, move the decimal over once to the left. You get 1.57. (drop the 3). That’s ten percent. Let’s say it’s 1.50.
Half of that is 75¢. Half of ten percent is five percent so now you have ten percent and five percent. Add them together to get 15%: 1.50 + 0.75 = $2.25 = 15% tip.
20% is even easier. If ten percent is 1.50, twenty percent is double that: $3.00
Also if u know what sales tax is in ur state u can double it. It’s 8% I believe in Cali, so I double to 16% and then feels math it up or down
Put the ball into an open net in Rocket League.
I love flakes road to… Without mechanics videos. My mechanics suck after thousands of hours playing the game but focusing on non mechanical aspects of the game really helped me. Still miss open nets though. (╯°□°）╯︵ ┻━┻)
Nice shot
Wow !!
Shut the fuck up
Two things at once.
A great deal of studies have proven the latest conventional wisdom: multitasking is a myth.
If it takes you 5 minutes to focus on and complete task A and 10 minutes to focus on and complete task B, trying to do them both at the same time instead of completing one and then completing the other guarantees it will take you longer than 15 minutes.
It very much depends on the task. So long as the tasks don’t overlap, in cognitive requirements, you’re fine. E.g. you can listen to a podcast, while washing up. As soon as the requirements overlap, then your point holds. E.g. I personally can’t write anything down, while listening to an audiobook. The resource requirements overlap.
It’s also worth noting that different people can do the same task with different parts of the brain. E.g. accurate timekeeping. Some people do it visually, others audibly etc.
Remember how many days are in each month. I mean, I guess maybe I could if I tried harder, but I refuse.
EDIT: ok I’m seeing everyone’s tips here, and thank you, but I gotta say… None of these heuristics seem any amount easier to remember. 😭
Make both hands into a fist and hold them out in front of you so that the knuckles are visible. Now start on a pinky and count the knuckles and valleys between them. Knuckles are 31 days, valleys are 30 (and February). When you switch between hands it doesn’t count as a valley.
Left Pinky knucke: January, 31 days
Left Pinky/ring finger valley: February
Left Ring finger knuckle: march, 31
Left Ring/middle: April, 30
Left Middle: may, 31
Left Middle/index: June, 30
Left Index: July, 31
Right Index: August, 31
Right Index/middle: September, 30
Right middle: Oktober, 31
Right middle/ring: November, 30
Right ring finger knuckle: December, 31Whats the point? When do I need this information?
Bring on the 13x28 calender and end the madness.
Use your knuckles and the space between from left to right. The higher points are longer months.
The left pinky knuckle is January, the space between pinky and ring knuckle is February, the ring knuckle is March and so on. The left index knuckle will be July and you continue with August being the right hand index knuckle. All the months that land on a knuckle are 31, while everything else is 30 (except 28 or 29 for February).
30 days hath September, April June, and November.
All the rest have 31 except for oddball February.
This seems as easy to memorize as any one Shakespeare play
I genuinely can’t comprehend this statement. I’ve always heard it and it just sounds like random words jumbled together
Knuckles seem easier
31 29 31 30 31 30 31 31 30 31 30 31
It alternates between 31 and 30. The exception being that February got shortchanged and had to give a day to August, and it keeps alternating after that.
Due to leap year magic February has to give up yet another day, so it’s either 28 or 29.
30 days hath September,
April, June, and November.
Getting laid and stop being a virgin. And no, I don’t want to pay for a pro to lie me.
Bruh, I’m a fat fuck and not only did I get laid, I married a beautiful, wonderful woman half my weight. A amazing woman who loves me for who I am and finds me sexually attractive.
Be kind, be generous, ask questions, and do basic like, grooming and bathing and whatnot. If you’re socially awkward, study the ways of the Chandler. (Not necessarily literally, but honestly you can learn a lot about being pleasant to be around and interacting with people by watching actors fake it, which you can then use to fake it until you’re more comfortable).
Sex itself isn’t the goal, becoming a well-rounded person you would like to be around is the goal. Because self-confidence is an elusive but important factor.
I’m not going to claim to be without privilege, I’ve got a damn sexy voice and I sing in a chorus, which is a great way to meet people. Which is another part of my advice, find hobbies that let you interact with other people. They don’t even need to be people you’re sexually attracted to, because time with people helps you to be better around people, and being better around people helps those people to introduce you to others.
If it’s honestly something you want, becoming the kind of person who fucks is a very attainable goal. After all, our entire species is here because lots of people achieve that goal.
But like I said, it’s important for your aim not to be getting laid, but rather genuinely getting yourself to a place where you like yourself and know others will like you, too. Journey before destination, you know? It’s really really easy to wallow and pretend it’s outside your abilities, but that’s true of anything that you have never done before. And literally everything you do is something you can get better at.
Don’t give up, don’t despair.
Who the fuck Is Chandler?
Also I’m sorry but you’re basically telling me to fake myself. I cannot do that, it literally makes me sick in my stomach trying to “fit in” I have 0 desire of having another worthless hobby just to be more desirable… It doesn’t feel genuine, already dropped a few of those that I HAD the will to do, imagine a hobby that I don’t a give a shit about it how good that would go
No you have to be genuine
Buddy, your account is 10 hours old and all you’ve contributed is negativity. I’m not surprised you can’t get laid, your attitude is bad and you seem like an unpleasant person based off the tone of your comments.
Nobody likes someone that’s perpetually angry. Buddy’s advice to you basically boiled down to “be yourself and be a genuinely kind person” and you just straight up dismiss it as “faking it”. If you have to fake being nice then you should get some help.
Be kind, be generous, ask questions, and do basic like, grooming and bathing and whatnot.
He is basically telling you to be nice to others. To work on yourself to become a better person. Something we all are supposed to be doing and most of us are doing. And sometimes, when you don’t feel like it, to be nice to others anyways. That’s just basic human decency and interaction.
Nobody is telling you to fake yourself. But we all sometimes are feeling like behaving like an asshole, but then we don’t.
Basically, work on yourself to become a person others like to be around and don’t be an asshole.
Who the fuck Is Chandler?
Chandler Bing, the sarcastic “nerd” in Friends (who, like every sitcom character, is actually highly attractive of course).
Not saying you need to watch Friends (it hasn’t aged super well), but honestly sitcoms can be helpful for social training. To some extent, anyway.
Also I’m sorry but you’re basically telling me to fake myself.
No, I’m suggesting you find way to change things you don’t like about yourself, to make improvements. You’re going to feel like you’re faking it any time you try to do something you aren’t comfortable with at first, but the more you do it the more comfortable you’ll feel.
I cannot do that, it literally makes me sick in my stomach trying to “fit in”
Not telling you to try to fit in. I’m telling you to try to improve your interpersonal skills. Trying to fit in is trying to copy everyone else and be what you think they want you to be. Instead, try examine the way other people interact to learn how to be less awkward.
You won’t succeed immediately. You will make a fool of yourself. I spent decades making a fool of myself. Still do make a fool of myself. But that’s okay. The only real cost are the frustratingly intrusive memories of embarrassment. 😅 But hey, that’s how we learn.
I have 0 desire of having another worthless hobby
Who said anything about worthless hobbies? I’m confident there are things you’ve never tried that you would enjoy. If you don’t like it, find something else. Branch out. Spend time around people, that’s the important part. Not just for getting laid, but for like, longevity. Humans who have consistent social connections live longer on average.
Look, I’m not making demands of you here. I’m trying to give you advice that worked for me. If you don’t want that advice, just ignore it. But you remind me of my own attitude when I was younger, and I’m just letting you know what helped me.
I am significantly happier now than I was twenty years ago. But it’s not like I’ve reached some end point, change is the only constant. Improving myself is something I will probably never stop doing. Lately it’s been about learning to be a better partner to my wife, but it’s also still always about learning to be more comfortable outside my comfort zones. A lifelong, ongoing process. Like I said, journey before destination.
If left to my own devices, I would spend most evenings smoking weed, playing video games, and listening to podcasts or TV. Activities I love. But if that were all I did (or, rather, when that was all I did), I would (did) enjoy my life far less.
Don’t get me wrong, this isn’t easy. A line from the TV show Scrubs that has stuck with me for years goes “nothing in life worth having comes easy.” I don’t know if I entirely agree with this line, but there is absolutely some truth to it. Every day we choose between the pain of effort and the pain of regret.
Anyway, I don’t want to be annoying. I hope you find what you’re looking for in life, dude.
It’s great that you’re taking that other guy to heart.
Just wanted to say that both of your replies are great comments, they’re both useful and positive, love seeing comments like yours. They’re well thought out replies!
People like you help to give me back some of my faith in humanity.
i cant understand distorted speech, while most people around me obviously can. i have never been able to understand anyone speaking into a loudspeaker.
It’ll always be a mystery what Kenny says. Seriously, people understand him?
I have this problem, as well. Distorted amplification, song lyrics, speech against loud background noise? Forget it. Oddly, I got a pair of Shokz bone-conducting headphones recently, and noticed that I have been understanding lyrics for the first time in songs that I’ve been listening to for 30+ years. (I should really listen to that song about how “Shareef don’t like it; Fuck the passport, fuck the passport.”
yeah, same. i dont seem to have any problem with my ears per se, it seems more like a processing/noise filtering thing in my brain that’s not working at full power. i think my dad had it too.
Was surprised I started mixing up left and right after I broke my right-hand wrist while biking.
Turns out I subconsciously associated “right” for the direction my stronger hand was on, and once my left hand started feeling like the more dominant one during recovery - my brain would automatically choose that “right” should be on my left-hand side instead, until I actively thought about which direction is which.
This gradually decreased out as my right hand recovered and got back to being the dominant one over the next few years, but was eye-opening what shortcuts my brain uses for such basic things.
Wait, are you saying you didn’t have to actively think about which is right or left before? I’ve always had to think about it, only for a second, but it’s definitely an active thought thing for me.
Really?
Yeah, definitely. I didn’t know people didn’t have to think about it for a second.
You’re not the only one, it takes me a second or two. Sometimes I make an L shape with my hands to see which way is left. Then again, sometimes I forget my age and name haha.
My wife has trouble with this as well. She’s also not very good with spatial reasoning, I wonder if those are linked
I always look for my ring, then I know which hand is left.
This is wild and I genuinely can’t wrap my head around it.
So say, if you were blindfolded and run, if I give you command a la those rally drivers you will have a noticeable lag to my cue ? Like not instant ?
I mean, it’s a split second, but yeah, I gotta think about it. I don’t think there would be noticeable lag, but it’s definitely a conscious thought. I just thought everyone had to have the thought go through their head, it’s not just like an instinct or anything.
I guess the brain is just weird like that. This is also news to me, I thought “doesn’t know left from right” is just a figure of speech.
And now I’m down into the rabbit hole.
https://www.bbc.com/future/article/20230112-why-some-people-cant-tell-left-from-right
Now that you mention it, it’s odd that some people (like myself) have to think about it. Like I wouldn’t have to hardly think about what you meant if you said “up” or “down.”
Think of it like telling someone the directions like “twelve o’clock” versus “six o’clock” or “three o’clock” - you probably have to take a tic (heh) to picture it.
Yeah, the BBC article I posted above also mentions that.
At first I thought it would be like if someone told me to touch my nose and I have to consider which part of my face it is, because for me my body is split in the middle the left and right feel distinctly different I can’t confuse one with the other. Fascinating.
Are you ambidextrous by any chance?
I keep trying, but no, not ambidextrous
Funny enough, I stopped mixing up my left and right after I broke my arm roller blading (on another occasion I broke my arm while biking). I didn’t have a way to mentally keep track until the doctor set the arm slightly off with the bone bowing out a bit - it feels slightly different now, but visually you can’t tell.
That’s really interesting. There are probably more people like you, but who will never know if nothing happens to their dominant hand.
I can’t snap very well. Or whistle
Whistling took me literal years to get, but it’s great to have. And it’s just one form of whistling, some people can do it with their fingers but I can’t be arsed
Same!
