How to get out of an uncomfortable egg culture situation with this one simple trick.

Real talk: Calling people eggs is a violation of the egg prime directive, and is considered invalidating as you are trying to say that a person is not the gender they identify as, that their identity is invalid. Don’t call people eggs, like ever, it’s extremely uncool.

  • livus@kbin.social
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    7 months ago

    Wait when did “egg” in the context of gender and sexuality become a thing?

    “You egg” is an old insult in New Zealand since at least the 1980s meaning you are a dork or loveable idiot.

    Edit: there’s heaps of examples in Taika Waititi’s NZ films.

  • Nora@lemmy.ml
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    7 months ago

    Fem boys aren’t an example of an egg anyways. If a person is calling a femboy an egg they are completely misunderstanding what an egg is.

    Eggs are funny and sometimes adorable because they don’t quite know who they are and they give hints at who they want to be. A femboy is someone who knows who they are.

  • thefartographer@lemm.ee
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    7 months ago

    Is this really real? Egg seems like such a fun and friendly thing to call someone, like saying they have a lot of potential! I don’t want look it up now cuz I’m gonna get my heart broken. Thank you at least for the warning, assuming you are being genuine.

    • betheydocrime@lemmy.world
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      7 months ago

      It’s ok to call yourself an egg, but calling other people eggs is like saying “I know your gender identity better than you do”.

      I’d say the only time it’s ok to call someone else an egg is if it’s past tense, if the person has transitioned, and if their transition is public knowledge.

      • thefartographer@lemm.ee
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        7 months ago

        Oof, that sounds so horrible! I’m not even sure that using egg in past-tense seems right. That feels like drinking with buddies when someone who’s known you your whole life starts regaling the group with the last time you peed the bed. Sure, it’s out of your control and there’s nothing to be particularly ashamed of, but why you gotta bring that up, yo?

      • RenownedBalloonThief@lemmy.ml
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        6 months ago

        I’ve always thought of it like the prime directive: you shouldn’t interfere, you should only be there in a supportive fashion when it happens.

    • Baby Shoggoth [she/her]@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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      7 months ago

      An egg is a term in the LGBTQ community for someone who is exploring their gender or is in denial of it. When an egg cracks/hatches, a trans person has accepted who they really are. Calling someone an egg is telling them they’re trans, and is not something anyone should dictate about someone else.

      • алсааас [she/they]@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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        7 months ago

        Hard agree, I just got a case of the brainworms during my last mental breakdown phase (still ongiong). I did/do hate myself enough enough to browse it for a while (luckily I never rly posted/participated and only been there for a short while). Also deleted the app I used to acces the chans but I’m still sorry for all the ppl on /lgbt/ bc I feel the pain and dysphoria lvls

        Some vocabulary, however, is just accurate and fitting imo.

        Fyi: I’m against the full medicalization of trans-ness and think a model akin to the on of neurodivergency would be a good pov. (fuck truscums, tho as I said I feel sorry for their lvls of hatred, as I can very much relate).

        But they are right about some things like the toxic positivity in many trans spaces, especially hugboxing.

  • Uriel238 [all pronouns]@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    6 months ago

    There is a general rule in the LGBT+ community now we have a lexicon (and some indices) of terms by which you can navigate your desires, feelings and behavior.

    That lexicon exists to help you sort out who you are. It’s not there for you to categorize other people. People really don’t fit into categories (in any sense) and there are always outliers and fringe cases.

    If someone starts an I wonder if I’m an egg conversation, its okay to engage with awareness of comfort levels. We each are captains of our own respective identities.

    The hardest thing for people to grok is identity ≠ behavior. The continued necessity of the closet means we are still not free to be our true selves in public. Yes, this can be weird, but even close friends can gatekeep by surprise. We need room to explore and be cautious, even if you, personally are dedicated to inclusion and tolerance.

    So yeah, if someone seems enby or trans to you, they remain whatever they identify as, and only they get to decide when it is open to discussion.

  • CombatWombat1212@lemmy.ml
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    6 months ago

    The hell is an egg?? I’m a fluid femboy and I stg we get so lost in semantics man like what is this? Is this really a thing thats affecting people?

      • CombatWombat1212@lemmy.ml
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        6 months ago

        And we’re discussing this distant niche slur over other topics in the LGBT? I just dunno man:/ like you’d have to be so deeply in the know to call someone this

        • Sop@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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          6 months ago

          This is 196, don’t take it so seriously. It’s a thing that happens to femboys who are in trans aware circles/communities. This image is just a small psa and it’s valid. If you have another topic you want to discuss you’re free to make a post