Because it seems I only get interest from really fem twinks. Doesn’t matter what I look like. When I was fat — twinks. Now that I’m not fat — twinks again.
And it’s not that that they’re not sexy or that the sex is bad. But it’s everything aside from sex.
Often it feels like dating a very “traditional” woman. As in, you have to initiate and plan out everything, their interests are very stereotypically feminine (fashion, pop music, celebrities) and they play a lot of games.
Why is it so hard to find a gay man who’s just a normal man? Just have some beers, play some video games, go to the gym, stuff like that.
I’m interested in answers here as I’ve seen what you’re talking about. I do see bros in relationships out in the wild but never asked them how.
Where are you looking for guys? Apps? Which apps? Meetups? Bars?
Well I’m mostly just on Grindr and Tinder. In my country and city (Belgrade, Serbia) it seems that most of the masc gay guys are not out. So you can’t have a real relationship with them, it’s just sex.
And then you have the gays who are out and looking for monogamy but most of them are very stereotypically gay. As in, bunch of female friends (and the associated drama), obsessed with pop music and fashion, and if they’re into politics then it’s the most liberal feel good kind of activism.
None of that would really matter if they didn’t play so many games all the time. They’ll be hot one day, tell you how sexy you are… then the next it’s oh they’re so busy and also your new haircut makes you look so much older but don’t worry I’ll fix you…
This is the kind of stuff my straight friends tell me that a lot of women do all the time.
Are we as gays just doomed to the heteronormative top=man, bottom=woman paradigm? Because I’m honestly tired of it.
I’m in a very different locale NYC where it’s not like that at all. I imagine culture in places like Serbia would definitely cause the problem you’re having. I’m sorry.
Also fwiw I’m bi and there are also plenty of women here that don’t play games like that. Though yeah the chase is a little different with women than with men.
The stereotypical gay thing btw I think it’s a way to let guys know you’re gay without having to have other men guess about your orientation. I don’t like it either, but I understand why it started.