A large smoothie at Jamba Juice was $12.61 today. (15% tip)

Somehow, my phone number got printed on an ISP provided router that services like trailer parks in Arizona. So I get calls randomly asking “Hey is this ____ Internet?” & I go “No sorry, this is just some dude. But hey, where did you find this number? I just wanna know why people are keeping calling me”

And fuck if it isn’t like pulling teeth. I literally just want to know where it’s printed.

“Uhh, so this isn’t Blank Internet?” Click

“It’s the Internet number” “yeah but like where are you reading it from?” “The internet” “Oh like a website?” “No, like the internet… so you can’t fix it?”

Voicemail: “Hey this is Joe Oldman. I live at 113 blank drive. My social security number is 0000005. Can you send someone down to fix my internet? Thanks”

Finally someone under the age of 40 called me and finally said “this is the number on the back of the router” but even when I asked “So what router is it? Like where is it printed?” “Idk”. Like dude, you literally just read this number and typed it in your damn phone. What are you looking at.

You might have even less shootings if 100% of people on earth had guns. Even babies

My sarcasm wasn’t clear enough I guess.

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