I like to imagine that A. Meateater composed this sentence after he went to China and witnessed his first vegetable

UK’s books are in the black again because they ran out of red ink

Like charges repel

There are also kappa males who require constant moisture applied to their foreheads and steal people’s buttplugs

It’s a plush toy that can be turned inside out, which Greta Thunberg famously had in the background of a picture of herself and her friends in support of Palestine. According to liberals on Twitter, it vaguely resembled an octopus from some antisemitic caricature; which (1) was only true in the way that the Big Dipper resembles an actual dipper and (2) if you make this kind of association unprompted it says more about you than about Ms Thunberg or Palestine

I love it when the people calling us insane and cowardly for not wanting ethnic cleansing in Gaza suddenly come forward with their phobia of Free Parking signs, jellyfish plushies, watermelons, and triangles

Ain’t no way a Hoxhaist is reading the French Press

You gotta do a 180 before you can do a 360

Little did the Reaper know he just removed a loadbearing element of the machine

Zelensky on the Time cover is the perfect illustration of what having a bad migraine feels like

I never go on dates; not only are the fruit rendered completely inedible in the process, but your soles would remain sticky for at least a week. I can extract little meaning from this outlandish arrangement and am completely in the dark as to why people would get such bewildering ideas

These are justified criticisms you have every right to make, but please remember to wear a facemask while pronouncing the “TH” sound in public

No, obviously there were exploiters and rent-seekers during the Bronze Age, but capital has a distinct dynamic as opposed to other means of production such as land, namely that it can be expanded: A hectar of land in an agrarian society only produces so much grain, vegetables, or livestock every year, but the only upper limit for the production of machinery is the amount of available labour.

A land-owner can only expand at the expense of other land-owners, while capitalists also can - and are even required to - expand at the expense of the workers they employ. They use machinery and labour to obtain wealth and then use that to obtain more machinery, and so on. This arrangement has a dynamic of exponential growth, which no previous form of production had, and therefore capitalists are in a position to shape society in vast excess of what land-owners can and could do.

There weren’t any capitalists around the time of Jesus’ death. The word “Capitalist” refers to someone who extracts surplus value from labour by owning the capital - either machines and factories, or the financial means thereto - which workers operate. A capitalist can only exist in the context of industrialing or industrialised society, and there were no such societies during the Bronze Age.

Yeah in Germany every car has a 30cm red triangle in the side of the trunk and you are supposed to put it up a few metres behind the car when it breaks down so people can see that there is going to be an obstacle on the road

Eating a lot is not the original meaning of gluttony in Catholic mythology. If you look at some of the self-evident deadly sins like envy, pride, greed, or wrath, you see these don’t refer to a specific action you commit, but rather an abstract emotional attitude, a “pre-sin” from which actual sins stem. For instance, sloth is not you spending an afternoon on the couch, it refers to a general lack of goals and eagerness to the point that it is harmful to you; and lust does not refer to having a lot of sex, it refers to your thoughts being dominated by desire. In the case of gluttony, it refers to a general obsession with having things in excess of what is good for you.

On a side note, in German traffic law they later came to mean the seven ways of wrongful driving that warrant criminal prosecution: Not respecting right-of-way (pride), wrongfully passing other cars (envy), driving wrong at pedestrian crossings (gluttony), driving too fast at an intersection (greed), not driving in the right lane (wrath), attempting to turn on motorways (lust), and failing to mark defective cars in traffic (sloth).

In this case, it is more like gastrology

Really bro, molecules? Did you think you were being sneaky trying to sell us on the idea of establishing hierarchies of electron shells?

wait, are you unironically gonna talk smack about the liberator of Auschwitz? if so why

We do not support the DPRK because of any supposed liberal-democratic trappings. We support it because despite suffocating under US-American pressure, its government compares exceptionally favourably to others with similar national wealth, eg. Somalia and Haiti, when it comes to development of its own material conditions as well as the quality of life; which is why it is frankly delusional to conceive of the West installing any government in North Korea, be it dictatorial or democratic, that makes better of the poor resources than the current one.