• QualifiedKitten@lemmy.world
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    8 months ago

    Dating/romantic relationships. I usually manage to uncover multiple deal breakers on the first date, and I’m pretty sure that’s more of a “me” problem, than a problem with the type of people I date.

    • I have BPD, which means that the longer I know someone, the more faults I find and the more I start to go from liking them to hating them.

      It is very much a “me” problem, but one that has no solution yet. 😮‍💨

      • QualifiedKitten@lemmy.world
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        8 months ago

        Oh man, I’ve really slowed down my dating, so it’s hard to remember many of them. I know some of these are actually reasonable, but others are just me looking for faults/expecting perfection:

        • Is a night owl
        • Works in a field that requires odd hours
        • Isn’t 100% against having kids (most recent one said they didn’t mind either way, which makes me worried they’ll eventually realize they want kids)
        • Has children, even if they’re already adults
        • Laughs weird
        • Previously married (most recent one lost their previous partner to cancer a few years ago)
        • Not regularly physically active
        • Has dietary restrictions/allergies
        • Doesn’t drink alcohol ever
        • Obvious political differences
        • Doesn’t like cats and/or my cats are scared of them
        • Has a dog, especially if it’s small and/or if they take it everywhere
        • Has “weird” pets, like snakes or spiders
        • Has a messy home
        • Still lives with their parents
        • Contramuffin@lemmy.world
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          8 months ago

          Thanks for the candid answer. I understand the urge to nitpick. Although, for the life of me I can’t understand how having a dog could be a negative. I feel like at worst that would just be a neutral? I’m guessing you’re not a dog person?