• Scubus@sh.itjust.works
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    9 months ago

    I’m all set up for the down votes, but in my experience as a non-trans individual, there are two common components to being trans. There is the masculine/feminine side of things, aka gender, which I find to be incredibly stupid because it’s a cultural construct that is largely self imposed in the adult world as long as you don’t have hair thick skin. I really want to do away with gender and gender roles entirely so no one is in a box and everyone can do what they want regardless of what they identify as.

    Then there is the body dysmophia side of things, where you physically do not feel comfortable with the way your body presents. This I totally understand, despite not suffering from it, and is imo the only legit reason to transition.

    If anyone wants to teach me anything about this, feel free to leave a civil comment and we can have a discussion.

    • idiomaddict@feddit.de
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      9 months ago

      I’m afab, but don’t feel like a woman. I recently immigrated to a country with a gendered language, and it feels almost like faking an accent to use feminine words to refer to myself- like I’m clearly misleading people, but in a mostly harmless way. I’m not sure if I’ll ever transition, but if I do, it won’t be because of me hating being inside my body, it will be because it feels more honest to those around me and I kinda feel like a scumbag “deceiving” them constantly.

      I don’t really know much about trans theory, so I don’t know if there’s a good argument to convince you, but I think mine is a good reason to transition.

      • Scubus@sh.itjust.works
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        9 months ago

        Afab? And yeah that’s kinda my point, I want to do away with gendered language because it seems kinda pointless. And can you explain more about what you mean by deceiving people?

    • MBM@lemmings.world
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      9 months ago

      and is imo the only legit reason to transition.

      That’s actually a pretty contentious topic in trans circles (transmedicalism/truscum). Personally I don’t really see the issue with transitioning for whatever (well-informed) reason, as long as you’re not taking up resources for those with dysmorphia

    • eestileib@sh.itjust.works
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      9 months ago

      Check out the Gender Dysphoria Bible online; it’s a very good resource. Or read the WPATH-8 recommendations if you want the actual scientific/medical consensus.

      In my experience as a trans person with gnc tendencies, you cannot simply wish away gender for everybody. There are people who don’t really feel any attachment (“agender” people). But most people do, deeply.

      As an aside, starting a conversation by gatekeeping how people in a group you don’t belong to are allowed to feel, then gatekeeping how they are allowed to express themselves, is generally not a way to get them to open up to you.

      The equivalent for me might be “as a white person, in my opinion there are only two valid reasons for a black person to have their hair in locks (a and b), any black people who want to respectfully explain anything about that to me are free to do so…”

      If I open the conversation like that, I’m not likely to gather much new information.

      I think that may be why you’re not getting the polite interactions you’re looking for, your post was not particularly friendly.

    • Fal@yiffit.net
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      9 months ago

      which I find to be incredibly stupid because it’s a cultural construct that is largely self imposed

      Oh please explain this more. We need your cis gender expertise to explain how gender doesn’t matter

      and is imo the only legit reason to transition.

      Wtf. First, why else would someone transition? And even so, who are you to gatekeep what reasons are legit?

      • Scubus@sh.itjust.works
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        9 months ago

        As for the first part, I feel like I explained it fairly well. Literally just do what you want. It’s the equivalent of saying “I’m nerdy, so I can only do nerdy things.”

        As for the second part, yeah I mean I shouldn’t be gatekeeping but I phrased it that way to show that I do understand that reason.

        With that being said, I posted that with the hope of learning, and while your comment feels a little aggressive, I appreciate that you stayed civil. Can you explain why my understanding of gender does not work?

      • papertowels@lemmy.one
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        9 months ago

        By simply mocking the person for saying gender roles are stupid, the naive conclusion is that you are for gender roles.

        If there’s nuance there, it’d be great for you to tease that out, otherwise it just looks like you’re for gender roles, or gatekeeping the topic.