• bob_wiley@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    It sucks she’s dealing with that. She doesn’t need to publicly self-describe as anything though, if that’s what she’s doing. I never understood why someone’s sexual preferences needed to be public information, and it seems commonplace these days. I don’t think I’ve ever explicitly told anyone my preferences, but I’ve had a lot of people make assumptions and talk behind my back about it. I still don’t tell them, as that doesn’t seem like the type of person to tell things to.

      • bob_wiley@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        Getting to know someone as a friend and if it seems like there might be more there, and some trust, share and see how things go? Broadcasting it doesn’t sound like it’s going well, as it sounds like that information is getting to a lot of people who shouldn’t be trusted with any personal information, because they’ll use it against her. Although it sounds like the genie is already out of the bottle, continuing to make a a focal point vs letting it just be some known thing people aren’t thinking about so much, could still go along way.

        13 year olds are generally awful when it comes to making fun of someone’s vulnerability. I think that’s where a lot of defense mechanisms are born. I used invisibility, for better or worse. Hopefully whatever she finds is a healthy way to process it and deal with it.