• gregorum@lemm.ee
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    9 months ago

    bullies hate when the dehumanization of their victims fails— even more when their victims rise like the phoenix, stronger for the struggle.

    bullies are narcissists: they feed on the pain and misery of others in order to boost their own self-esteem. when their victims refuse to play that game and flourish despite the relentless attempts of the bully to tear them down, it’s like kryptonite to the bully.

    • Grail (Capitalised)@lemmy.worldOP
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      9 months ago

      I’d appreciate it if you didn’t say such mean things about my mental disorder. At the very least, maybe you could swap the word “narcissist” for person-first language into “person living with NPD”.

      • gregorum@lemm.ee
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        9 months ago

        It is possible to both feel compassion and understanding for these people, while also, realizing the very real danger they can present to themselves and those around them.

        Description is not prescription

        • Grail (Capitalised)@lemmy.worldOP
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          9 months ago

          There’s no scientific evidence that people with NPD are dangerous. You’re just spreading unfounded rumours that you haven’t bothered to verify, about how mental disorders make people dangerous.

          • gregorum@lemm.ee
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            9 months ago

            Donald Trump is all the proof anyone needs

            but here’s some more:

            https://www.narcissisticabuserehab.com/darvo/

            DARVO (Deny, Attack, Reverse, Victim, and Offender) is a tactical maneuver manipulators use to groom individuals, and, indeed, entire social groups. It involves controlling people’s perception of events through a specific sequence of actions. Those who experience the DARVO process often feel disoriented as the perpetrator of abuse actively revises the facts and distorts the truth. By crafting a fictional narrative that bears no resemblance to reality, they sow seeds of doubt. Bystanders, regrettably, accept the manipulator’s lies as truth. Meanwhile, the recipient of the abuse becomes a scapegoat and a target of vilification.

            https://www.selfgrowth.com/articles/pathological-lying-narcissistic-personality-disorder-traits

            https://psychcentral.com/blog/psychology-self/2017/09/narcissistic-projection#1

            just the diagnostic criteria from the DSM indicate the dangers:

            https://motamem.org/wp-content/uploads/2019/08/Narcissism-Criteria-DSM-V.pdf

            denying the facts does not change them.

            • Grail (Capitalised)@lemmy.worldOP
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              9 months ago

              Donald Trump does not have an NPD diagnosis. If you’re going to name random people to invent an argument, then I may as well do the same thing and claim that Bob Ross, Mr Rogers, and Carl Sagan had NPD.

              https://www.narcissisticabuserehab.com/darvo/

              Narcissistic Abuse Rehab is a hate website founded on reactionary feelings, not on science. DARVO is a real thing, and I’m sure they have good sources for its existence. But they have no sources connecting DARVO with NPD, because there isn’t a connection.

              https://www.selfgrowth.com/articles/pathological-lying-narcissistic-personality-disorder-traits

              That’s an opinion piece that appears to be based on a tweet. It’s not scientific evidence.

              https://psychcentral.com/blog/psychology-self/2017/09/narcissistic-projection#1

              That’s an opinion piece on a blog which cites other opinion pieces on blogs. It’s not scientific evidence.

              just the diagnostic criteria from the DSM indicate the dangers:

              Only one of them does, and its inclusion in the DSM was controversial. Many experts argued against even including NPD as a diagnosis.

              https://www.psychiatrictimes.com/view/new-insights-narcissistic-personality-disorder

              Conceptualizations and diagnostic definitions of narcissistic personality disorder have primarily focused on the more strikingly provocative, self-enhancing, entitled interpersonal behaviors and attitudes that tend to capture the attention of clinicians rather than on the patient’s underlying, internal struggles. This has contributed to making the diagnosis more judgmental rather than informative.

              Here’s another source:

              https://www.thehotline.org/resources/abuse-and-mental-illness-is-there-a-connection/

              A common assumption we hear at The Hotline is that abuse is caused by a partner’s mental health condition, for example: bipolar disorder, depression, anxiety, post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), narcissistic personality, borderline personality or antisocial personality. While these are serious mental health conditions, they do not cause abuse. Nothing in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, fifth edition (DSM 5) states that a mental illness solely causes a partner to be abusive in a relationship; however, there are a select few diagnoses that can increase the risk of abusive patterns to show up in a relationship and in other areas of life.

              • gregorum@lemm.ee
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                9 months ago

                Your opinions are rejected, as are your whataboutisms, cherry-picked responses, and other fallacious and spurious defenses.

                Ya know, you really should stop spreading medical disinformation with discredited sources. It’s very irresponsible, especially while claiming victimhood. Of, course, I know you won’t. You literally can’t control yourself. It’s a psychiatric disorder, and for that I pity you. 

                “The perpetrator or offender may Deny the behavior, Attack the individual doing the confronting, and Reverse the roles of Victim and Offender such that the perpetrator assumes the victim role and turns the true victim – or the whistleblower – into an alleged offender.”

                Wise words. Interesting that the website describing your behavior precisely is the one you called a “hate website”. Nice try at gaslighting…

                No, I’m gonna block you and live the rest of my life never thinking about you again.

      • hudson@sh.itjust.works
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        9 months ago

        Bullies and narcissists often don’t like having a negative light shone upon them. Why should anyone capitulate to your demand that narcissist be seen as a victims or treated that way? That sounds like classic gaslighting and DARVO technique. 

        • Grail (Capitalised)@lemmy.worldOP
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          9 months ago

          People with NPD should be seen as victims because NPD is a mental disorder and a disability, because it’s caused by child abuse, because it increases lifelong vulnerability to intimate abuse, and because you’re currently claiming disabled people are bullies.

          You also came into this comment section to attack disabled people without reading the article.