Sometimes communicating feelings and sentiments with others can be rather meaningful for some. Reading someone else’s articulation of thoughts and feelings that you share or resonate with but haven’t formed a clear picture of can be rather useful.
Yeah but we could probably do it without saying someone else’s hobbies are “pointless” and “fucking stupid”. I’m all for expressing our feelings. But maybe do it without yucking my yum and patronizing me. You don’t get to be the arbiter of what I enjoy.
someone else’s hobbies are “pointless” and “fucking stupid”.
I don’t think that was said. The whole thing was a subjective description of their reasoning. Couched objective reasoning in an attempt to justify themselves, clearly, but also from a clearly subjective and emotional perspective.
I’m exhausted. I’ve been guilted/peer pressured into participating in the AoC for at least 5 years. I’m tired, I’m defeated, I’m unable to meet its weird expectations
I feel a working fallacy in conversations like this (maybe amongst tech people in particular) is a presumption of absolute objectivity. Their opinion makes sense to them and others who understand (the voting is fairly split) but is also equally inapplicable to others.
Instead of fighting over what’s “true”, the more interesting discussion IMO is mapping out where boundaries and spaces are and what the different perspectives are. In this case, the chief boundary seems to me to be between “youthful hunger” and “more mature/experienced broader outlook on what the ‘craft’ is”.
Oh I don’t have an opinion on what is true. I love doing work outside of work. I enjoy writing programs for myself. I enjoy code challenges. I enjoy working on cars. I enjoy fixing things. It’s more the “doing work outside of work is fucking stupid” that is in big bold letters, as well as “it’s pointless” in big bold letters. That just comes off in a way that gets under my skin.
I will say that none of my friends or coworkers have even mentioned AoC. I’m not pressured by anyone into programming outside of work. Some of my friends and I have worked on projects together, but only because we wanted to and enjoyed it. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with a hunger to learn and improve. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with not wanting to write code after work. Sometimes after a particularly challenging project or a release that went south and required me staying til 23:00 on a Friday, I don’t even want to think about code. Or problem solving for that matter.
I just think letting people enjoy what they enjoy is typically a good policy. And discussion isn’t being invited when you’re essentially telling someone their hobby is wrong. If it were framed as “here is why I don’t enjoy AoC, I think it would have been more welcoming of discussion. The way it’s currently phrased is like crossing your arms in a conversation.
I do think the divide between people who just really enjoy programming, and people who just see it as a job is interesting. I’ve definitely had discussions about that with colleagues. None of us have told the others that their preferences are stupid.
That’s just my two cents, though. I don’t like discussing something with someone who comes from a place of hostility instead of open mindedness.
From the OP’s comments it seemed that they felt like there was pressure in their environment, in which case the relative aggressiveness makes a bit of sense. Otherwise maybe they were just trying to be edgy or misread their environment with some misplaced priorities.
Either way, I was personally happy to read it as a personal rant and take away whatever made sense to me. A more polite and logical rant would have been nice and better though, for sure, except that that’s also harder to write and can prevent people from just sharing their thoughts in a “raw format”.
Sometimes communicating feelings and sentiments with others can be rather meaningful for some. Reading someone else’s articulation of thoughts and feelings that you share or resonate with but haven’t formed a clear picture of can be rather useful.
Yeah but we could probably do it without saying someone else’s hobbies are “pointless” and “fucking stupid”. I’m all for expressing our feelings. But maybe do it without yucking my yum and patronizing me. You don’t get to be the arbiter of what I enjoy.
I don’t think that was said. The whole thing was a subjective description of their reasoning. Couched objective reasoning in an attempt to justify themselves, clearly, but also from a clearly subjective and emotional perspective.
I feel a working fallacy in conversations like this (maybe amongst tech people in particular) is a presumption of absolute objectivity. Their opinion makes sense to them and others who understand (the voting is fairly split) but is also equally inapplicable to others.
Instead of fighting over what’s “true”, the more interesting discussion IMO is mapping out where boundaries and spaces are and what the different perspectives are. In this case, the chief boundary seems to me to be between “youthful hunger” and “more mature/experienced broader outlook on what the ‘craft’ is”.
Oh I don’t have an opinion on what is true. I love doing work outside of work. I enjoy writing programs for myself. I enjoy code challenges. I enjoy working on cars. I enjoy fixing things. It’s more the “doing work outside of work is fucking stupid” that is in big bold letters, as well as “it’s pointless” in big bold letters. That just comes off in a way that gets under my skin.
I will say that none of my friends or coworkers have even mentioned AoC. I’m not pressured by anyone into programming outside of work. Some of my friends and I have worked on projects together, but only because we wanted to and enjoyed it. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with a hunger to learn and improve. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with not wanting to write code after work. Sometimes after a particularly challenging project or a release that went south and required me staying til 23:00 on a Friday, I don’t even want to think about code. Or problem solving for that matter.
I just think letting people enjoy what they enjoy is typically a good policy. And discussion isn’t being invited when you’re essentially telling someone their hobby is wrong. If it were framed as “here is why I don’t enjoy AoC, I think it would have been more welcoming of discussion. The way it’s currently phrased is like crossing your arms in a conversation.
I do think the divide between people who just really enjoy programming, and people who just see it as a job is interesting. I’ve definitely had discussions about that with colleagues. None of us have told the others that their preferences are stupid.
That’s just my two cents, though. I don’t like discussing something with someone who comes from a place of hostility instead of open mindedness.
Totally fair!
From the OP’s comments it seemed that they felt like there was pressure in their environment, in which case the relative aggressiveness makes a bit of sense. Otherwise maybe they were just trying to be edgy or misread their environment with some misplaced priorities.
Either way, I was personally happy to read it as a personal rant and take away whatever made sense to me. A more polite and logical rant would have been nice and better though, for sure, except that that’s also harder to write and can prevent people from just sharing their thoughts in a “raw format”.