I don’t understand how wanting to use feminine pronouns for someone femme-presenting and “wanting to be a woman” is “forcing an agenda”? Is respect an agenda now?
Also, it seems like it would give her dysphoria to use he/him pronouns on someone who wants to be the opposite gender (although I realize pronouns =/= gender)
If you’re genuinely curious, I can give you a glimpse into their rationality (though I strongly disagree with it).
Say, for just a brief moment, that you consider trans people to be mentally ill. Calling them by their preferred pronouns would be like giving a drink to an alcoholic–you’d be encouraging it, which would be to their detriment. And worse, you’d be liable to whatever diety might be displeased with your actions that caused someone else to continue in their sin.
Of course, that only works if you have a very poor understanding of both gender and theology. The real reason the bigots don’t like trans people is because it challenges their worldview, which is uncomfortable. And instead of facing that head on, they’d rather try to justify their current view.
The Oatmeal wrote a great info comic on this.
If we’re giving them the benefit of the doubt, which I don’t think most deserve, there’s also a theological argument. For religious people (specifically Christians), they believe that people are made to God’s plan. If you are born male, they believe that’s what God intended. So changing your gender is, in their mind, blasphemy against God because it’s denying his plan for you.
Of course, this argument completely falls apart when you draw the parallel to people who change their hair color, get corrective or cosmetic surgery, etc. God also intended you to be blonde with bad eyesight, but you dyed your hair and got Lasik.
But the real answer is just bigotry. They try to rationalize their bigotry, and may not even recognize it as bigotry themselves, but that’s what it is.
Even more apparent is when you draw the parallel to birth defects, diseases, or literally any reason we affect our bodies.
Pretty much all bigots don’t realize it. There are almost no Bond villains in real life–humans can’t really exist in a state where they truly believe they’re the “bad guy.” Some people know they’re wrong, but they see themselves as a victim, not a villain.
Not only do they not recognize their bigotry, they believe themselves to be the “good guys” in this situation, with opinions on other people ranging from condescending pity to complete disregard.