When I was single the weekends seemed quite long. I would sleep half of the Saturday, watch some TV shows, clean a bit and sometimes visit some friends. And Sunday evening I would play bass in my metal band. Nice and easy.

But now that I have a family and small children there is never time to do anything. The kids always need something, food, diper, entertainment, make them sleep, clean up. Wash the dishes, wash the clothes etc. Once we’re done with them it’s 9pm, we try to watch a movie and my partner falls asleep of exhaustion within 20 minutes. I try do watch it to the end so I can tell her the summary in the morning.

It’s totally regarding to have kids but I wish the weekend was one day longer.

    • CosmicTurtle0@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      4 months ago

      I don’t have kids and I look at parents and I honestly don’t know how they do it.

      It’s hard enough taking care of myself.

      How parents take care of kids on top of everything else is a mystery to me. I assume you all get magic powers like Hermione did in the second or third book to go back in time.

  • Remy Rose@lemmy.one
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    4 months ago

    The 40 hour work week was a goal set by people working way more brutal hours, not infrequently 7 days a week. People fought really hard for decades to change it, and when I say “fought” I mean literally. Many of them were murdered by the state or corporations for it. But they got there.

    May I introduce you to the 4/4/4 movement?

  • Album@lemmy.ca
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    4 months ago

    Yeah man i get you.

    When I was a kid to mid 20s and had nothing to do I’d sleep all day and game and skate all fucking night and time just seemed to drag like molasses.

    Now in my mid to late 30s I’m busting my ass every day to make life happen and there’s no real moment to stop. I got used to it but I totally get why people wake up at 8am every day…I have shit to do. If I don’t go to bed at midnight I’m a mess the next day.

    The recent long weekends have made the 5 day week feel long and the 2 day weekend feel short.

    I think it’s supposed to get better after the kids get a bit older. You get more time to yourself as they get more independent. I’m in no rush tbh. Life is wicked short I don’t need it to go any faster.

  • souperk@reddthat.com
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    4 months ago

    I have a 4 day work week, at some point I tried a 5 day work week, within a year I was depressed and gladly accepted a 20% paycut to got back to 4 days

    • maegul (he/they)@lemmy.ml
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      4 months ago

      Yea, I think there’s likely something that objectively makes sense to the 4 day work week. If you want actual time off that feels like it’s yours … 3 days feels like a bit of a minimum … that middle day with a buffer either side feels like it’s untethered to the work-week, something that 2 day weekend does not give you at all.

  • tooclose104@lemmy.ca
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    4 months ago

    I work a 4/3 schedule, which is far better for the extra day, but it’s still not enough… There’s a tantalizing 7/7 possibility murmuring about though

    • 7U5K3N@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      4 months ago

      Dude across the street does 7/7 he took one week of PTO and went to Texas.

      That one week of PTO got him 3 weeks of paid time off. Just amazing.

  • TomSelleck@lemm.ee
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    4 months ago

    I became a stay at home parent and we’ve been able to reclaim our weekends. 90% of the cleaning gets done during the week, so we have time to actually do things as a family. It also gets easier as they get older. Physically anyway. Just hang in there.

    • sunzu@kbin.run
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      4 months ago

      I hate how this got so shittted on and now nobody even makes enough money for it anyway.

      It is not fair that both people need to work when kid is tiny. Kid needs a parent around at that stage but we don’t support parents in this country in fact we like to fuck them

      • BearOfaTime@lemm.ee
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        4 months ago

        I know a number of families with one parent working. They just chose differently. They don’t have a massive, expensive house, they don’t vacation in Disney, they don’t have brand new cars, nor expensive cars, the kids don’t have the coolest gadgets, etc, etc.

        They just chose differently than other people.

        • sunzu@kbin.run
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          4 months ago

          That’s anecdotal and I didn’t imply it does not happen.

          We do know it is not very prevalent though not sure on stats.

          Also, one person still has to make enough money for support 2-3 dependants. That’s inherently would require a decent income or paid off house…

        • glimse@lemmy.world
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          4 months ago

          Congrats on the one parent with enough income to do that but that’s not reality for most people…

        • Klanky@sopuli.xyz
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          4 months ago

          This is us. We often have to make sacrifices that our friends and family don’t (seriously don’t understand how people afford to eat out all the dang time and go on so many vacations) but it’s worth it.

          Edit: as an example, my 10 year old nephew has a brand new iPad and just got an Apple Watch. Meanwhile, we are holding out as long as we can to replace my wife’s busted old tablet and can’t ever imagine spending money on a smartwatch when we have phones. Obviously not everyone has this privilege that we do and I am thankful for it.

  • dohpaz42@lemmy.world
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    4 months ago

    And I’d bet dollars to doughnuts you wouldn’t trade it for the world. It’s exhausting, but oh so worth it. Make sure you and your partner make time for each other. It’s too easy to lose yourselves to the kids, and that can hurt a relationship. Even if it means extra screen time or an early bedtime for the kids, do something for yourselves.

  • jerkface@lemmy.ca
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    4 months ago

    Having kids is a scam and you’re trying to convince yourself you’re not a sucker.

    • wizardbeard@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      4 months ago

      Where exactly do you expect the next generation of people to try and improve the world is supposed to come from?

      What is your plan for care as you age and your body fails? It’s not the responsibility of children to actively be the caregiver, but you at least need someone of sound body and mind to be an advocate for you and ensure you aren’t being screwed over when you can’t look out for yourself anymore.

      Inb4 the inevitable “I’ll just kill myself before I get old” shit. Good luck with that with no easily available, reliable, and painless ways to do so.

      • calcopiritus@lemmy.world
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        4 months ago

        I don’t owe this world a kid. If the country needs more children it should use my taxes to encourage people to have children. If they do it well enough I might have a child myself.

  • whome@discuss.tchncs.de
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    4 months ago

    Find stuff to do that you can do with the children that you genuinely enjoy doing and not just bc the kids like it. I for example started getting good tools to build advanced sand castles. I enjoy doing it I have more possibilities because of the better tools and the kids live it as well.

    • waz@lemmy.world
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      4 months ago

      I see what your getting at, and I like it, but if I’m off building sand castles, who is doing the laundry, cleaning and food prep for the week?

    • Jeena@piefed.jeena.netOP
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      4 months ago

      Yes, because those are the days where I can spend time with the people I love, even if it’s packed with stuff to do.

      Even if my work colleagues are nice people I would easily replace one day with them to a day with my family every week.