For context: This campaign is set in Greek mythology years after the trojan war and a second kidnapping of Persephone has caused Demeter to cancel Spring again.

Meet Diomedes, the Unsung. He was a fearsome warrior and cunning strategist blessed by Athena herself in his prime years. Many of the great deeds attributed to other heroes (Oddyseus and Ajax for example) were his accomplishments, but success amplified his own hubris until the fateful day he offended Hera.

She sent her champions and creatures to smite Diomedes, but he bested them using his cunning. In the end he could not escape a curse causing him to be forgotten by any living being and that what he treasures the most (his glory) being given to others.

Being forgotten that way, Diomedes resigned himself to a peaceful, quiet and humble life watching over his descendants, who couldn’t remember him.

And now with eternal winter looming he drags his old bones into the underworld to save his descendants (and by extension the world) from frozen misery.

Mechanically he is a Custom Linage (ambiguously human) Dirge Singer Bard (from Keith Baker’s Exploring Eberron) with a reflavoured Strixhaven Student Background focused on supporting his unlikely comrades as much as possible. This old man has trouble hurting anyone by himself, but he is still a fierce and cunning commander.

The Dirge Singer Bard gets broad inspiration allowing him to inspire twice as many people at the cost of slower progression on the bardic inspiration dice. And at a higher level he can use his reaction to allow an inspired creature to make an additional attack.

Barbagosh, know affectionately as Barb, is an elderly Half-Elf. She seems to be gaining powers of sorcery as quickly as she is losing her marbles. She comes from a fishing village known as Jigow, where she worked in the Unbroken Tusk Inn as a baker. She prided herself on making delicious pies, and resented that Agathe, her orc colleague, held the title for best pies in the city.

Barb is thought of in Jigow as a kind old lady who is everyone’s granny. A wise lady who could help with your garden, or baking tips, a mediator between feuding neighbours, an avid reader that had lots of knowledge of the local area, and a fabulous cook that could fix any problem with food. A few months ago however, she began to change. Working in the kitchen at the Inn, Barb was baking a delicious fish pie when she was unable to find her measuring spoons. She assumed that Zorgath, a cheeky orc child, had taken them for a game. Rifling through a drawer that had been jammed closed as long as she had worked there, Barb came across a set of wooden measuring spoons that seemed deceptively light. She continued baking the pie, and using the spoons, but began to feel ill. Cold to the touch, and pale, Barb went home early, forgetting the measuring spoons in her apron pocket. Overnight, Barb continued to grow weak and unwell, waking in the morning with barely a heartbeat, and a bluish tinge to her skin. Wearing the same clothing as the day before (unheard of for the meticulously clean woman), Barb left her house to head back to work. She did not greet the neighbours with her usual ,cheery smile, and did not respond to Zorgath, running up to her with a cheeky grin, holding out her beloved spoon set. Barb went through the motions of baking her fish pies, but each one was a little off. Instead of adding baking powder to the flour, she would add sugar, instead of water to make the gravy, she poured in vinegar. When Agathe appeared to begin her shift, she was shocked to see Barb placing the pie the gently in the oven using hands that were not hers. A spectral hand had appeared, that Barb seemed to be controlling, Barb was totally unresponsive.

The following day, Barb continued on her routine as normal. Walking to work, she greeted the neighbours cheerily. She play-acted the grumpy old lady with Zorgath as she gave back the stolen measuring spoons. She walked through the door of the Unbroken Tusk Inn and picked up her baking apron, ready to start her day. Agathe questioned Barb about what she had witnessed, but the old lady was confused and told Agathe she must be imagining things. Barb remembered feeling unwell and staying home from work, how could she have possibly been doing what Agathe was claiming?

As the weeks went on, these ‘funny spells’ as Barb refers to them, became more frequent, with the magic persona taking skillful control, while the non-magic persona became increasingly vague and confused. One day, Barb woke up on the back of a Horizonback Turtle, with no clear idea of how she got there, and nothing on her person, but a bit of gold and a set of bizarre measuring spoons that she didn’t remember owning. Barb had lost all memory of who she was, where she was from, but she knew one thing- she could do with a nice cup of tea.

TL;DR- A senile, but surprisingly powerful sorcerer who loves a cup of tea.

I am playing Arthur Cuddington, a 49 year old human man who until recently was a professor teaching the history of magic. He then had a mid-life crisis and decided to strike out as an adventuring wizard, enrolling as a studen in an academy for adventurers at which our current campaign takes place. He’s a skinny and incredibly dorky dude, but he loves to tell the party fun historical facts about the regions we visit, which I make up with the help of ChatGPT.

My character is an Aberrant Mind Sorcerer, with the Telekinesis Feat. I’ve tried to take only spells that can be explained as manifestations of psychic power. The character’s name? Robert Brün. As in, Bobby Brown. As in, Millie Bobby Brown.

I haven’t told my DM or the other players about the pun, yet. I’m wondering how long it takes until they figure it out 😁