Literally the Star Wars.
Including “…somehow Palpetine returned”
I don’t watch trailers to movies because I don’t like movies I know I’ll watch to get spoiled. I just groaned when I read that Palpatine had returned, and they put it in the opening scrawl!
What, you mean you missed the canonical Fortnite event of Palpatine’s voice ringing out across the galaxy? And then felt like you had somehow missed key plot events despite having watched all the movies because you didn’t participate in some fad videogame marketed to tweens? So it showing up in the opening crawl felt forced, unimaginative, and honestly just stupid?
Yeah, that sounds like my experience too.
Stop giving away spoilers! That hasn’t even happened yet!
Are you kidding? It happened a long time ago! In a galaxy far away, no less.
I really ponder how anyone over age 21 can interpret it any other way. There are no supernatural books or stories. All kinds of people claim they hear the voice of god, it’s the popularity of these specific stories that defines them as religions.
Science shows religion stories fit the pattern of schizophrenia: https://www.wnyc.org/story/dr-joseph-campbell-inward-journey-schizophrenia-and-mythology/
I really ponder how anyone over age 21 can interpret it any other way.
Indoctrination from an early age explains it.
Santa and Easter Bunny we indoctrinate people into at a young age and we don’t have trouble explaining that they are fiction… still are useful stories.
Usually in those cases parents confess to the lie at some point or children find out from others that were confessed to. They’re also much easier to prove false, especially with modern cameras. Can’t do that retroactively
Community. They do it for other reasons than the stories. They will defend the stories and say they aren’t literal because you are on the outside. And once you are on the outside it’s usually where you stay.
I played in a church’s band for a while. It was easy money. Then they wanted someone who’d do it for free, so, y’know. I was happy to make room and not have to play horrible music.
Mormonism is so totally Christianity fan fiction, it’s had weird sex stuff added to it
The Torah and the Bible already have weird sex stuff in it. There’s relatively explicit stuff like the Song of Songs, but then again you also have weird nonsensical incest such as the daughters who get their father drunk to rape him for no reason whatsoever, which you cannot convince me wasn’t written because some Israeli writer was horny. Just people writing about weird kinks like we’ve seen people do ever since the internet went live, except that the fellas making up the religion needed texts to add to the lore and said “Fuck it, let’s get this one in too”.
What I’m saying is that you just have to be born at the right historical time to get your kinks made part of religious canon.
Loll it has Native American fanfiction AND sci-fi too. Apparently God lives close to a star called kolob, and
we’ll allgood Mormons will be building planets someday.Also sex stuff. For good
MormonsMormon menThe spice orgy@@
Go on
Google Mormon soaking, if ye dare
Not just Mormonism, all Christian and Islamic branches are basically fan fictions based on the original books.
The originals weren’t even that original, they couldn’t decide on which creation story to
stealincludeYeah cause the church mostly killed off the Christians with other books.
The trilogy isn’t complete without a Jar-Jar Binks type character to play as the Antichrist who secretly rules the galaxy as a Master Sith Lord.
That’s scientology.
Mee-sa RonRon Hubbard.
Isn’t Jesus the messiah in the Quran? Muhammad was just the messenger. In the Quran Jesus is literally called Al Masih, the messiah, and will ,according to the Quran, return to earth on the day of reckoning as the savior of Muslims.
Well, the summary above is a little shaky there. The Quran just doesn’t believe that the person that was written about is the actual Messiah but another prophet. The same I believe with the Jewish faith. They’re both still awaiting the Messiah, whereas Christians are awaiting the second coming of the Messiah.
I haven’t really looked into these religions in over a decade so my own memory could also be faulty, so take with a grain of salt.
Jesus 2, Torah drift
Jesus 2 Bigot Boogaloo
Mission Impossible 2: Jesus Rises
My understanding was that in Islam, they do believe Jesus was the messiah, and that he will come back in the end times, but not that he was God/the son of God. And that he wasn’t delivering Gods final message, which is where Muhammad comes in
But like you it’s been years since I put Islam under a microscope so I could be off too
Damn it Hollywood, just let the franchise die already.
Whether he is the messiah or not I don’t know, but all you said is correct.
That’s how I understand it, as well. Muslims hold Jesus in high regard as a holy prophet, and even have more stories about miracles he performed that aren’t in the New Testament. But he’s not considered the Messiah.
But Jesus is called Al Masih in the Quran. Which literally means the Messiah. So which is it?
I know I heard somewhere that the name Jesus shows up more in the Koran than it does in the Bible.
Jeebus wasn’t in the Old Testament so that’s half the book (idk if it’s half by volume) without that character.
Well yes but don’t let the Bible literalists hear you say that, haha. They still consider Isaiah to be the fifth gospel and Daniel to be referencing him.
The NT is smaller than the OT and the letters of Paul (pretend that he wrote all of them which he didn’t) make up over half of it. Paul does talk about Jesus but a lot of it was in the form of an entire page with one mention of the man by name, plus all the other stuff like how church should be run. With that and Acts+Revelations we pretty much exhaust all the chances of Jesus showing up.
Lol don’t I feel like a dope! You obviously know your stuff. Does the NT add to the OT, or is it a soft reboot like the new Star Wars sequel trilogy?
TL:DR the authors of the bible got some details of the OT wrong, Jesus was made to quote Jewish thought that wasn’t in the OT, and you could argue that since Paul invented so much it is basically a reboot.
Don’t feel that way. An atheist shouldn’t have to know this stuff, feel bad if you are a Christian. The answer is yes-and-no.
The authors of the NT didn’t have the entire (for what we call now) OT, they had parts of it. There are about 17 (the exact number is debatable) writers of the 27 books of those only one could read Hebrew and probably had all of it. Why is this important? It is important because you see them, and Jesus, not aware of certain books and filling in gaps with what they wanted. Paul for example certainly acts like he didn’t know the book of Micah. This is an example of retroconning by omission. Which isnt the worse I admit.
And we also have deliberate retrocons. Like the 1st Gospel of Matthew changing the genealogy to get the same ancestor distance between Moses and David and David to Jesus.
We also have plain mistakes. Matthew has Jesus get basic quotations from the Torah incorrect, Mark mixes up some historical details etc.
The big thing is that Paul was the one who threw out the Moses commandments. To him they no longer applied. He also invented ideas not really found in the OT explicitly stated. Original sin, the importance of baptism, the perfext sacrifice. So again a sorta reboot since the practice and ideas are now totally different.
Jesus in the Gospels incorporates ideas that were part of Jewish culture but weren’t in the OT. You got to understand, the man most likely didn’t exist, so the people talking about him could make him say what they wanted. The golden rule is not in the Bible but it is found in the writings of Hillel (rabbi who died half a century earlier) so they made Jesus say it. All those arguments he supposedly had with the Pharisees? Those were Pharisee debating positions of the time. In that sense I would say it is an add on.
Sorry a bit long. Did this all make sense? I prefer to think of it as a branch off of Judaism rather than a continuation. A branch off led by a con about a fake brother that got out of control.
Edit: oh shoot I forgot to add the most obvious one. The 4th Gospel, and people who love it, basically retroconned the Genesis story. The whole in the beginning there was the word and it was with God thing.
Fun fact the second coming isn’t explicitly mentioned in the Qur’an but the text can be interpreted to imply that he may comeback.
Book of mormon is the self insert fan ficttion thet got picked up by a publisher
Mormonism is the fifty shades of gray to Christianity’s twilight
Quran vs new testament is more like Enders Game vs Enders Shadow. Enders Game is about Ender, and Enders shadow is about Bean, but Ender’s significance is mentioned.
They’re all just the different movies of the Fast & Furious franchise. The plots don’t generally matter or connect to each other in spite of their common elements, everybody’s talking about family, people who haven’t looked into it assume it must have some redeeming qualities, characters die and come back when needed for the plot, once in a while they inexplicably fly or end up in space and Vin Diesel never loses a fight.
Don’t forget the Bahái 4th movie what nobody remembers exists!
Ok it isn’t our fault that we don’t remember it. The movie only had a limited theater run in one market. Also it was poorly marketed.
Sounds like The Matrix to me
Blessed are the RPG lesbians, for they shall inherit the earth.
This is an interesting way of looking at these religions. From my limited knowledge it seems like a good high-level summary.
It could be interesting to expand this to include Buddhism (Hong Kong cinema?), Hinduism (Bollywood?), Baháʼí (?), cults, etc. Not sure if the metaphor will stretch so far…
That’s like comparing Star Wars, Star Trek, and Stargate my dude.
Star Wars, Star Trek, and Coneheads
Don’t talk about the Amish like that.
I’ll talk about yo momma all I want, sucka!
No one remembers Farscape. Australia’s attempt at sci-fi relevance. Hey we exist too!
🙃
The Buddha is as badass as Chow Yun-Fat for sure.
The Buddha would be like that time you found some kung-fu movie and checked Wikipedia to find out that you just watched the 32nd in the 43 movie long franchise. All with the same lead. Then remarked to yourself “how many times will it take before the criminal-ninjas-drug dealers learn to not randomly kill someone this guy likes?”
Really. He has a book about him that is slightly over twice the word count of the King James Bible.
careful if they see this they’ll argue which of the movies came first
No they won’t…
The funniest part about it all, is that the Muslim says that anyone that doesn’t believe is an infidel, yet the Jews think anyone that doesn’t believer is a dirty Gentile, I guess that makes Christians double filth?
exclusivity sure is a popular idea, they keep bringing it back.
God needs a good IP lawyer.
