Do the little tentacles move like those of a sand dollar, slowly propelling the wearer who, presumably, is stood otherwise motionless, arms crossed, wearing a pair of oversized sunglasses and an expression of stoic defiance?

If so, I may be interested.

If you squint, it kinda looks like a cat playing with a mop

I’d like to wear a variant of this that doesn’t have high heels. It’s probably unstable but comfortable.
Like going back to your ex.